"A Warranted Apology"

Why do I bother?

Why do I have this curiosity?

All it does is give me this twisted, pained, lump in my chest.

Nothing compared to yours I'm sure, but still, it's there.

I want to apologize to you. Not for anything dealing with him.

I want to apologize for taking away your outlet. When I wrote to you, I really wanted to be a drifting stranger who understood and could possibly help you. Even if the help was miniscule. I just felt the need to try. Your suffering does have something to do with me.

I've seen myself mentioned before.

I thought maybe reaching out to you and showing you that you aren't alone could ease your mind.

I'm not sure why I wanted to help. I guess because we have something in common. We both know what(who) that is.

I guess thats where my curiosity stems from, this thing we share.

It's odd being on the other side of this.

You are going through what I did two years ago.

And this time, when I watch, or read, it happen...

being on the other side,well, it still hurts.

Well, anyway. Thats not really important. I'm not sorry for anything but my writing to you.

If it had been anonymous, you would still be able to vent.

I wouldn't have to watch you pretend.

I wouldn't have to sit there at my computer and feel you seeming much more mundane and fake.

What you're saying isn't fake, but I can tell you're not saying what you want to say, what you need to.

I feel like I took away your hiding place.

I feel like you are pretending to be in a place you are not. You couldn't be.

That was even more obvious by your latest post.

It wasn't right of me to take away your anonymity.

I know I would never want mine taken away.

I am sorry.